Monday, 2 March 2009

The Hotel Gym

It takes me less than five minutes to exhaust all the possibilities of fun in my hotel room - I have eaten the free biscuit, made a cup of tea, drank the spare milk (one of my guilty pleasures I am afraid), turned on the taps (and off again, obviously), swooshed the curtains, hung up my clothes and charged my mobile. There is nothing else for it, it is time for the gym. Besides, I have to work off my two a day Twirl habit (oh yes, am totally over the food poisoning now and back into bad old ways).

The gym lies deep in the basement, and is not just a gym, but a leisure centre. This means it has a bored person handing you towels, a place to drink orange juice, a plunge pool inexplicitly always filled with elderly ladies using strange circular floats, a jacuzzi, several lounge chairs and a little glass walled gym, so people can watch you sweat. The good thing about the gym is that you can instantly see whether the one running machine is in use, and the bad thing about the gym is that if someone is using it, you may have to hang around pretending to stretch for hours before you get a chance to jump on.

Tonight was such a night, I pulled every yoga pose I could remember from memory in various positions around the busy running machine, but no joy. This meant I retreated to the feared step machine instead, and climbing the equivalent of the Eiffel Tower (ok, 25 floors). By the time the running machine was free I managed 10 minutes and nearly collapsed into the jacuzzi. I get the feeling I will pay for this exercise tomorrow!

My time on the internet is nearly up chums (£6 for an hour! Evening robbery!) and I have some bad music to listen to on youtube before I am done (Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep - Middle of the Road. I am so into it!) I will catch up with you soon. Take care!

10 comments:

Aspiring Writer said...

So much fun reading your posts, eating twirls and collapsing into the jacuzzi. Such chuckles. Great to hear you're enjoying yourself, and your own coy. Cute.

Rose said...

you do well. I am always to scared in those places and end up in the jacuzzi because I think the gym people will laugh at my pathetic attempts at running/ climbing/ rowing. Still even if you do just go in the jacuzzi you can legitimately say you went to the gym!
I'm enjoying tales from the hotel somewhere

musicobsessive said...

'Chirpy chirpy cheep cheep?! You see, this is where exercise leads you - I suggest you cease exercising immediately or you'll be down the slippery slope to 'Agadoo'...or worse.*shudder*

idil o. calvero said...

i really gotto check this page more often.

Bruno Bouchet said...

Chiry Chirpy Cheep Cheep - I downloaded it again just the otherday. Love it. It has to be the only happy song about child-abandonment!

That writer

Jayne said...

Hi Joanne! Glad you enjoy them. Not sure I'll attempt the step floor-climber again in a hurry!

Jayne said...

Hi Rose! I find that with many of these little gyms, people prefer not to notice there is another person there at all. In fact, they go out of their way to not make any eye contact whatsoever, and if by chance I do catch someone's eye, I always feel like I should apologise. But yes - even if using the jacuzzi I can say I have been to the gym! Heee...

Jayne said...

Hi Martin! Yes, Chirpy has been upgraded to my iPod. Along with Barry Manilow's Copacabana. Is there no hope for me? I'm sliding fast into lounge music territory...

Jayne said...

Hi Idil! Nice to see you here. Are you going to update your blog again soon? Always good to see your lovely illustrations!

Jayne said...

Hi Bruno! That did make me laugh. 'Where's your mama gone? Far, far away...' (woohoo! Let's dance, kids!) I still love it, strange song though it is!