Monday, 18 October 2010

Miserable Mugs

The only mug left in the office cupboard was one printed with ‘I Love Spreadsheets’. You can rather see why it was unloved.

Why are all office mugs so bloody miserable? Open the kitchen cupboards of any establishment and you will see mugs printed with corporate messages, mugs with patterns too hideous to go in normal homes, chipped mugs, stained mugs, and mugs with evil falsely jocular work-related slogans. These are the sort of mugs I would like to see:

Mugs with the number for Saneline
Mugs printed with ‘Cheer up, it’s not forever’
Mugs with flower patterns
Mugs that say ‘Think of the money’
The ‘Keep Calm and Carry On’ mug

Do you reckon there is a shop out there that only sells sad mugs? And don’t get me started on the office fridge. Every time I put yoghurt in there it disappears from view, only to re-emerge slightly swollen three months later. I swear there is a false door, a secret draw somewhere in its grubby white interior that gobbles my things and spits them out past the sell-by date. Also someone always tries to cram their week’s worth of shopping in there, don’t they?

I’d also like to mention that the most pointless office snack of all is seeds. Yes, you heard it right, a little mixed bag of seeds that makes me a) feel like a parrot, and b) scatters everywhere each time I go for a handful. I may yet be the only person who manages to grow sunflowers around their office chair.

21 comments:

Pat Tillett said...

I suppose a few sunflowers around your desk would brighten your day a bit...
I NEVER used the cups at work...
I always had my own. I'm sure they were stupid as well!

Kyna said...

Our break-room fridge at work is a toxic waste dump. Seriously...I don't ever use it for fear of my health.

That was really funny about the mugs. And now I'm off to start the shop you were talking about, I believe it will make me some money. 'The Debbie Downer Mug Shop'.

Joanna St. James said...

Ha ha sunflower seeds gross me out cos i sat with two guys who were positively addicted to it and theirs came in shells. Dont let me gross u out.
The debbie downer mug shop sounds like the perfect place to go shopping for secret santa at work

Christine said...

The toxic work fridge is one aspect of working life I don't miss. I always stayed away from the plague mugs and kept my own, which was very bright and cheery.

Can't imagine the seed eaters being popular with the cleaning staff!

Colene Murphy said...

SEEDS?! That's not a snack! My drawer full of gummy bears, skittles, and crush soda object profusely! You do need happier mugs.

Fran said...

I want one that says, 'Nick my mug and you're a goner'. Not that I'm obsessive about my own mug or anything ...

Joanne said...

I'm laughing at the visual of sunflowers growing around your office chair. Can't you just see that comical scene in a television sitcom?

Talli Roland said...

I Love Spreadsheets?! Whoever made that mug needs a good beating. Or... shaking. Or something!

Happy Frog and I said...

I could not agree more about office mugs. Dreadful things. Don't get me started on the fridge, it is a scary place that reminds me of student squalor I endured years ago.

I don't know anyone who eats seeds at my place. It's more draws packed full of emergency chocolate and flap jacks!

Happy Frog and I said...

I could not agree more about office mugs. Dreadful things. Don't get me started on the fridge, it is a scary place that reminds me of student squalor I endured years ago.

I don't know anyone who eats seeds at my place. It's more draws packed full of emergency chocolate and flap jacks!

Old Kitty said...

Oh we have great office mugs in our tea room!! There's "World bestest (insert here)" There's one with a map of the world, there's mine which is Disney's Aladin cos I bought it disneyland!! yay! And there's one shaped like a football, there's a few floral ones...

Er... who brings seeds to the work place?!?! No, no, no! It's CHOCOLATE and Pringles for everyone thank you very much!

I agree about office fridges. They are portals to some food hellhole... and they reek every few months or so!! :-)

Take care
x

Ev said...

And what about those persons with an extra chromosome who seem to think that dirty cups wash themselves? We should start a revolution Jayne!

Hannah Kincade said...

I actually like that mug. Lol! I usually bring my own mugs to work though and keep them at my desk. I'm stingy like that.

Mimi said...

I agree, pity offices wouldn't buy nice mugs, it would cheer up the day.
...but, if we had nice mugs, would we be reluctant to go back to work?
our staff room has horrible mugs, so lots of people (incl me) bring in their own.
And then other people who get there early for break take them! Drives me mad!

Marguerite said...

Too funny about the mugs! lol Who in their right mind loves spreadsheets? An office where I used to work had lots of catered lunches. The leftovers would pile up until the door to the fridge wouldn't close! Yuck! Btw, I love sunflower seeds, too!

Jenny Beattie said...

I love it.

And office mugs... have you EVER looked inside them? Bleughhhh.

music obsessive said...

Mugs - quite agree. It's the ones that get left that really turn my stomach. Which is why I still have my 1984 Roland Rat mug with me at all times. And woe betide anyone...

Snacks - since when did seeds qualify as a snack? Everyone knows that the only snack worth its name is KITKAT.

Carole Anne Carr said...

Thanks for that post, I'm still laughing...

Rose said...

ha ha! I won two beautiful mugs and they were delivered to work. I thought about keeping one for my work drinks there but I knew it would end up chipped and sad looking so I didn't!

We have attempts to get cool ones- we had those all different coloured one- within about a month they were all looking chipped or had mysteriously gone walk about...

Shaharizan Perez said...

My office mug has a lion and says Chelsea, for the high school I teach in. I don't share and have put on the cupboard several times that these are not communal mugs.

However, I did notice that many mugs have sad little sayings on them.

Ema Winters said...

Hi Jayne, there is something on my blog for you!